Halloween

I am a bootiful princess.

Sadly this is the best picture that I have of Fang.

Halloween

DH and I took the little heathens trick or treating last night. DH was into Halloween for the first time. Ever. He normally doesn't get into dressing up or haunted houses or any of that fun stuff.
I assume it's because he grew up in BFE and never got the chance to go trick or treating as a kid. But in his zest to please the little heathens he dressed up like a cowboy. This excited Satan. She had to repeat about a million times, "my daddy is a cowboy".

I'm boring, and didn't dress up. I did wear an orange t-shirt with Happy Halloween and a black cat on it. That has to count for something.

Satan was a ghetto princess. She wore the dress that I made for her last year. Last year she looked so cute. This year the dress was looking ragged, and wouldn't stay up on her shoulder. It's all my fault, because I ignorantly let her play dress up in it about a week ago. She basically destroyed it, but of course I didn't realize this until yesterday. It could have been repaired, but I ran out of time.

Fang was a frog. He looked so cute. Every other day of the year with out prompting he will say frog. Then immediately begin to hop around and say ribbet. When I put the frog costume on him the only thing he would say was candy and thank you. I tried every thing. I bribed him with candy. At one point I even jumped around and said ribbet myself. He is stubborn.

Tater was a ninja. I have no picture of him in his costume. He went to a Halloween/slumber party, and I missed out on my picture taking opportunity.

Airport pictures.

Why am I here?

I'm really happy, but I'm pretending to be bashful.  

I'm so very happy that I'm picking up my dad today. 

Don't look at my head. I know my hair line is receding.

Da plane! Da plane!

DH lucked out, and was able to take an earlier flight. We picked him up at the airport this morning.

It was so good to see him. Right now we are all big smiling fools.

You will see very few blog entires from me in the next two weeks.

Velcro mode

This is a few days late, but I forgot to publish it. Enjoy.

I'm desperately trying to give the impression that I have managed perfectly while DH has been deployed. In my haste to clean the house, I was vacuuming. Really vacuuming. Using the attachments around the baseboards, and everything. Fang AKA Velcro baby sometimes has an uncontrollable urge to grab my legs and hold on for dear life. He generally gets hit with these urges when I am immersed in something that does not require giving him attention. Such as washing the dishes or vacuuming the hallway.

The dish washing tackles aren't so bad. I'm stationary, and have the support of the counter. However today, he was hit 'I must touch my mama now' urge while I was mindlessly vacuuming.

One minute I hear Satan and Fang loudly playing and singing. The next thing I know is that Fang has suddenly warped into Velcro mode and my legs are under attack.

I am slow.

He attacked.

I tripped.

I tried to brace myself and avoid landing on Fang all at the same time. Some how I managed to hit my foot into the door frame. It hurt. A lot. I cursed. A lot.

Fang laughed, clapped and said, "good job".

I wanted to laugh with him, but my foot was throbbing. I had to sit down. My pinky toe was no longer pointing in the same direction as my other 9 toes. It was bent to the side. And it hurt. I pushed my toe back to where it was meant to be. Then I cured some more. A lot more.

Now I have a lovely purple foot. That hurts like a bitch. It would have probably been less purple if I hadn't mowed the grass. Am I a dumbass or what?

Written 10-26-04 published 10-31-04.

The count down begins.

I thought I would have heard from him sooner, but DH finally called today. I was happy to hear that he made it to Kuwait in one piece. He will be flying out of Kuwait sometime soon. Next time I hear from him, he should be in Dallas. When will that be? Sometime between now and Friday.

The start of a long journey

I spoke to DH early in the day. He was preparing to leave Taji. This is the best news. He will try to call again when he gets to Kuwait. I hope that is soon. I don't have a time frame, and this makes me anxious. I need details and a schedule.

The past 8 months have passed by in slow motion. I never imagined time could possible slow down even further. It has. Today has been the longest day ever. I can't keep my mind on any one task, and I have gotten nothing accomplished. I should sleep. That would waste a huge chunk of time, but too excited to sleep.

I am

Congratulations! You are Lynette Scavo, the
ex-career woman who traded the boardroom for
boredom, mixed with moments of sheer panic as
the mother of four unmanageable kids.


Which Desperate Housewife are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

This is so true. There are days when I would like to leave my kids by the side of the road. heh

Some days I think I'm so not cut out for this SAHM gig. My kids are bad. I have no patience, and my ability to run a smooth orderly household is non existent. I long to be like Katie, when/if I grow up. Until then I will be a healthy mix of Roseanne with the mouth of Sharon Osbourne.

Isn't she pretty?

Pretty rotten, that is. ;)

Satan wasn't too happy about getting her hair cut. So she was making her pouty face. It never fails to cracks me up. Most kids stick out the bottom lip, she sticks out the top.

I thought I turned off that pesky date stamp. The yellow annoys me.

A good day.

I talked to DH today. He is already packed, and should be leaving tomorrow. WOO HOO!

I took advantage of the early voting, so as to not waste my precious time while DH is visiting. The court house was surprisingly empty. We were in and out in under 10 minutes. Then we were off to the hair cut store (that's what Satan calls the salon). Due in part to Satan once again trying to cut her hair. It had nothing to do with her very crooked bangs that I trimmed. ;)

Back at home, Satan wanted to play hair cut store. Being the good mom that I am, I said she could style my hair. I sat in the floor and tried to not scream when she buried the brush into my brain. Or when she tried to scalp me with the wide tooth comb. She styled my hair into a lovely cousin it do.

She smiled very sweetly and said, "You look like a monster."

I must have had an odd look on my face because she quickly added, "a cute monster, not a scary one." heh

Fang was driving me crazy with Blue's Clues. He carries around a small notebook and a blue ink pen. It has to write blue. He wants me to draw paw prints all freakin' day. I tried to be creative and change it up a bit. Since he likes Blue's Clues, and he likes dogs. The next logical thing was to draw a puppy. He would love that, right? Wrong. In his, I've already hit the terrible twos shriek, he screamed, "No, boos coos!"

Satan has such a good memory. We talked about DH coming home in a few days, and how we would have to pick him up at the airport. She remembering that we had tickets (boarding passes) when we took out trip this past summer. She has already figured out that DH will need tickets in order to fly, but she is apparently worried that he doesn't have one. So she does what all well meaning almost 4 year old daddy's girls would do. She made him plane tickets. She is just too cute sometimes. She cut several sheets of paper into thin strips. She then insisted that she needed the stapler. I ignored her and gave her a glue stick instead, but I'm mean like that.

She glued the strips of paper together. She then spent a great deal of time drawing and coloring on the tickets. We had to put them in the diaper bag, because we will "need" them at the airport. heh

Tater is anxious, nervous and fidgety. He will not sit still. I made him pick up the toys and things in the back yard, in hopes that he would settle down. He was so distracted that he just wandered around and didn't pick up anything. I jumped on his case about it. Now I feel guilty.

My face hurts.

I tried a new face wash, and I'm allergic to it. I'm going to dose myself with Benedryl and go to sleep. Hopefully, I won't look so scary in the morning.

Where is my stress free life?

I finally talked to DH. Due to the helicopter crash the phones and computers had been shut down. It's been several days since I've gotten any word from him. I'm OK if it's only a few days, but if it's been to long, I start to worry. Which makes me stressed. When I'm stressed, I snap at the kids. Which makes them grouchy. It's a vicious cycle.

DH sounded a bit stressed as well. The men that died were from his previous unit. I don't know if he knew them or not. I didn't ask, because I don't want to know. Ignorance is bliss. Not really, but I can pretend.

If all goes well, DH should be home next week. I should be relaxed, happy and stress free. I'm not. I'm not even close to being stress free. I'm stressed more than normal. I'm worried that he won't get to take leave. Then I will have to explain to Tater and Satan why DH isn't coming home. News like that will break their hearts, and I don't think I have it in me to comfort them. I'm also worried about the way he will act when he gets home. Things are going to be weird. He's been gone 8 months, and we are use to him not being here. I also know that the person I know and love is not the same person that is coming home to me. I don't know how I'm going to react to that.

I have way too much on my mind.

Goals, blogging and such

My first goal was to blog more often. I'm doing pretty well with that. I could do even better and blog every day. But I will get there eventually.

If you haven't noticed, I'm lazy and rarely answer my comments. I do appreciate the comments, really I do. In fact, I sometimes check several times a day to see if anyone left a comment. I get school girl giddy when I see a new comment.

So my new blogging goal is to answer comments. I have been inspired by Zoot. She is so cool, because she always replies to my comments via email. This makes me feel extra special. Because I'm starved for attention? Anyway, I'm not yet that ambitious, but I will remember to save that for a future blogging goal.

My weight loss goal has been pushed to the wayside. I desperately want to be cute and thin, yet I'm doing very little to reach my goal. Stress is part of the reason, the other part is that I've been avoiding everything that has anything to do with weight loss, like exercise. My original
goal was to lose 30 to 40 pounds. Forty would put me at the weight I was when we were married, but thirty seems more realistic.

I am confidant that I can do it this time, because I've found the right motivation. I think.

The best part of today.

A sleeping Tater.

A sleeping Fang, with his pretty pink Dora pillow. 

Sleeping Satan 

I'm moved.

I've just transferred all my blog-city entries.

Copying and pasting is hard work. heh

i am mommy, but you can call me bubba

Fang finally called me mommy. It sounds more like "mah E", but I don't care. I'm thrilled that he finally said it. It was driving me insane that he would say Sponge Bob Square Pants, but not mommy.

Today, was my dental cleaning and exam. Which went quite well, I have no cavities. :) Barbie agreed to watch Satan and Fang. Satan was thrilled. We have no pets at our house. Barbie has a kitty.

However, Fang being the Mama's boy that he is, does not like it when I leave him. So I conceived a plan, some days I think I'm a genius. I would buy Satan and Fang breakfast, they love those sponge like pancakes from McDonalds. I would take them to Barbie's house, get them all set up at the table eating their yummy breakfast. Then I would quickly dash out the door. Fang would happily eat his breakfast not realizing I was gone.

My plans never go as I intend.

I settle the kids down to their breakfast. I gathered up my wallet and keys. I thought I was being stealthy. As I opened up the front door to exit. Fang jumped out of the chair and came running toward the door. He screamed, "Mah E". My heart melted. I wanted to scoop him up, and kiss him. Unfortunately I was running late, and knew the melt down would be much worse if I went back. So I quickly and sadly dashed toward the van, and raced to the dentist.

When I retured, Fang was sleeping soundly. He tuckered himself out throwing his tantrum. It was so incredibly sweet when he woke up and saw me sitting there. He practically tripped over himself running to me. He gave me a big squeeze and said, "Bubba, I ya you." heh

dentist woes

I have such bad luck with appointments. Today the kids had a cleaning and exam scheduled for 2:20. I take Tater out of school, and drive all the way to Harker Heights. I sign in and sit down. Wait for a minute. The receptionist calls me to the window to inform me that they rescheduled my appointment. Why didn't someone tell me this? Just last week I got the reminder card in the mail, with todays date and time. GRRR!

Now I have to do this again next month.

teachers conference

I had the meeting with Tater's teachers, all 3 of them. Mrs. E, his science teacher, raved about what a wonderful student he is. How he always turns in his homework on time. He never acts out. He is the perfect student in her class, and he currently has a 92. She is quite proud of him, and claims he is one of her best students. Tater loves science so I wasn't surprised to hear that.

Sadly, the rest of his grades fall between 60-72. This is not good. Mr. F and Mrs. Z both agree that he would benefit from military kids club ( a support group for children of deployed soldiers). Luckily, they have one that meets at the school a few times a week. He is also signed up for tutoring 3 times a week. And is going to go to advisory for his handwriting.

Tater is such a tender soul. This deployment is causing his a great deal of stress. Not to mention the stress of the new school format. 5th graders switch classes and teachers. They also have lockers with combinations to remember. Sadly some nights he will stay awake all night worrying, or have nightmares that causes him to get very little sleep. I hope the MKC gives him some of the support that he needs.

At this point I feel really guilty. I don't give Tater all the time and attention that he needs. Satan and Fang end up getting the majority of my attention.They are still too young to fend for themselves, and some days I feel like they suck me dry.

But we do have a plan now, and Mr. F and Mrs. Z both agreed to give Tater a deadline. They are being generous and are allowing him to complete all of his missed assignments for partial credit. This should make some improvement in his grades.

I feel confident that we can all work together to get Tater back on track. Despite his bad grades, and his lack of responsibility recently. All 3 teachers said Tater was a joy to have in the class room. He is polite, kind and generous. He has a love of science and great potential.

Being the proud mother that I am, I interpreted this to mean that he will grow into the kind of man that will make me proud to have raised.

Ken to the rescue.

I know very little about motors of any kind. So when I killed the lawn mower, I knew exactly what to do. I would call my favorite auto mechanics teacher and Auto Zone employee, Ken.

I told Ken the tale of my lawn mower woes. How it had been putting and blowing out black smoke. That it started after the day Tater was bored and he cleaned the mower. He took great care in his cleaning. Much like some one would was a car. That he soaped it up, and sprayed it off with the water hose. He even used an old rag to dry. I was impressed, for he did this with out my urging, and he made it sparkle like new. Ken said washing the lawn mower isn't the best idea.
That the gas probably had water in it. I should buy some gas/water treatment. I should also change the spark plug, just because.

Ken was also over confident that a mere novice like myself could pull the spark plug out. And take it to Auto Zone. Where a friendly Auto Zone employee (Ken) would help me find the exact spark plug that I needed. Sounds simple doesn't it?

I pulled the spark plug. It did not budge. I thought, this is a job that requires tools. I located the tool box. I found the pliers. This was going to be easy now. Now armed with tools, I again pulled the plug. There was no movement. I started to rationalize, the mower is old perhaps the plug need a little wiggle to get it loose. So I tried to wiggle and pull. Still stuck.

I wanted to twist, but first I had to think, lefty loosey, righty tighty. That's right, turn to the left. So I gripped the spark plug with the pliers and turned to the left. Nothing happened. I tried for a good 15 minutes and I was still unsuccessful.

I called Barbie, and demanded asked nicely (even bribed with carrot cake) that she send Ken to my house ASAP, to fix the dead mower. He could fit my mower repair in during his lunch break.

Ken comes over, and guess what? You can't pull out a spark plug. You must twist the nut like thing that looked to be attacked to the lawn mower, but in reality is part of the spark plug. Needless to say Ken laughed. Tomorrow he will likely tell a class full of teenagers that know far more than I, about my spark plug ignorance. They too will laugh.

But I'm not worried because I got revenge. I made a carrot cake, and I didn't share. ;)

The package

A package came in the mail. Well to be exact, it was two large packages. My grandma love me. :) My present was some nice new towels and wash clothes. Along with a package of Charmin, 2 rolls of plain white Bounty and one roll of Dora the Explorer paper towel. heh

Tater ended up with a new outfit, new socks, under ware, assorted snacks and cool pens and pencils.

Fang was thrilled to get a Dora electronic game that teaches the names of colors in both English and Spanish. A pink Dora pillow case, socks, Thomas the train underwear, a Mickey Mouse winter outfit, assorted snacks.

Satan was the happiest because she now has Strawberry Shortcake sheets, and more Strawberry Shortcake panties. These are awesome present to a young Strawberry Shortcake fan. She also got a cute butterfly purse, a new winter jacket, and socks.

What would a present from Grandma be without socks and underware? LOL

Thursday and Friday

Thursday- I finally spoke to Tater's math teacher. We have a conference scheduled for Monday. I get to meet with all the teachers in his block. Since math is the only class he is failing, I wasn't expecting to meet with all the teachers. I'm curious as to where this will go.

I felt ambitious so I hung orange Halloween lights on the house. I'm have the only house on the street that is lit up in an eerie orange glow. I also poured an entire bag of fire ant killer on the front lawn. Since it's been so wet and dreary, I haven't spend much time in the yard so I didn't realize how many ant hills I had. The biggest ant hills is a good 2 feet in diameter. This is unacceptable. I want zero ant hills in my yard. I fucking hate fire ants.

Tater brought home a permission slip for tutoring. Why Mr. F didn't mention this during our phone conversation just a few hours before? Much to Taters displeasure, I signed the permission slip. He will now attend tutoring every Monday, Tuesday and Thursday, and I will have to pick him up from school on these days. I already miss the lazy afternoons of waiting for the bus to bring Tater home. I'm so lazy.

Friday-Satan and I were sitting on the swing. She was talking about the wedding, again. It was the same ol' same ol', until her light bulb went off. Then she informed me, "I have a good idea. When my daddy come back from Iraq. He can marry you." heh

That's a swell idea, don't you think?

The ants, the ones that were suppose to die 24 hours after being poisoned. Were alive and kicking. This pissed me off. So I bitched to Granny. Per her recommendation, I generously soaked the ant hill and the fire ant granules. As I chanted. "die mother fuckers, die." I thought the chant would add some voodoo like qualities and would warrant a success. I was wrong.

I joined the MOB

The forums are acting wonky. Thanks to this, my house is clean and I am bored.

In an effort to relieve some of my boredom, I have joined the MOB. heh

finding god

I'm rethinking religion. I think I shall find God soon, so I can have Saint Clinton as my patron saint. heh

Windex and hydrogen molecules are expensive

Satan is my helper. She loves to help me clean, prepare food, fold laundry and take care of Fang. This can be a good thing. It can also be a huge PITA. She likes to Windex things like the window on the oven and the full length mirror in the bathroom. Yes, I like a clean clear screen when I'm watching some reality TV, but she has been under strict orders to keep the Windex away from the TV. She has complied until recently.

In an effort to please me with a streak free viewing screen, Satan broke the TV. It was death by orange scented Windex. There was dripping out of the control panel. I had to breath, and count. Then breath and count some more, a lot more. I had to repeat over and over, "she was just trying to help. She was just trying to help." I'm pretty sure that steam was coming out of my ears.

After blowing it dry with the blow dryer. I can now turn the TV on and off. I can not change the channel or the volume. I also can not use the remote control. How will I break the news to DH that his girlfriend is damaged? He will be devastated if she is not working when he gets home. GRRR! Luckily we have the cable box, and the TV is stuck on channel 3. Otherwise we would be watching, not a damn thing. I want the TV to work. I do not want to take the TV to the shop and pay to have it fixed because it is new. As is we just bought the damn thing this past Christmas.

But the fun and excitement doesn't end there. That's because last night right as I was about to start dinner, Tater informed me that he needed to make a molecule. A hydrogen molecule to be exact. Sounds like a fun project, right? I thought so too. Until he told me that they had a week to complete it, but he forgot to tell me last week. Thats right, his project was due today. He had a week to tell me, yet he chose to wait until the very last minute.

Since I'm crafting challenged, I don't normally keep a stock of crafting supplies. I did not have any molecule making materials on hand. I had to scrap the dinner plans to make a mad dash to Walmart for pipe cleaners, in the middle of a thunder storm and pouring rain. Did I mention that it was pouring rain? Tater is very lucky that I care about his grades, and that I don't melt. I was very tempted to make him take a zero.

I didn't feel quite so bad, when i noticed that there were at least 5 other parents in the craft section of Walmart looking for molecule making materials.

This should have been a quick and inexpensive trip in and out of Walmart. How did I ended up spending $75?

By the time we left Walmart it was going on 7 there was home work to do and hydrogen molecules to make. There was no way I wouldn't have time to help with homework, make dinner and get the kids in bed on time. Taco Bell drive thru was my time saving plan, that cost me another $10.

A simple school project that should have cost less than $5 put me $85 in the hole. How did I let that happen?

My new and improved blog.

I've given up on blog city, and made the move to blogger. Now evil one can leave loads of comments, and I can view my blogroll. It's all good. :)

This is the link to my old blog. I plan to switch everything over soon. But I'm lazy so don't hold your breath.

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.