Are you frisky?

I had to go get a new ID card. Not a chore I was looking forward to, but it had to be done. I knew I would be sitting in a waiting room for far longer than 3 kids would enjoy.

I hate going on post. Because I am such a dumbass I always decide to go when it's busy, like right after lunch. Which means, I had to sit in a long ass line. Then flash my about to expire ID card just to get on post. I finally get on post, and locate the place that I need to be. Wouldn't you know it, the parking lot was full. I had to drive around for 10 minutes just to find a place to park. All that time Satan is talking non-stop, and I'm trying not to scream.

"Mommy, is this where my daddy works?"

"Yes, when he is home, this is where Daddy works."

"Mommy, I see my daddy over there."

"No you don't. Your Daddy is in Iraq."

"Mommy, are we in Iraq?"

"No. We are in Texas."

"Mommy, why are we in Texas?'

"Because we live here."

"Mommy, why do we live in TX." I think I let out a scream at this point.

Of course the only parking space that I could find was all the way at the end of the row. I had to walk a long way with three kidlets, in this miserable TX heat. Good thing I remembered to bring the stroller. Once inside, things started looking up because I was the first in line. How could things go wrong now? I have bad luck, that's how.

Why can't these things ever be simple? I don't have a power of attorney, but I do have a copy of the orders. I was told that this was all that was needed, and it would be easy and painless. I was lied to.

I get up to the desk, and the first thing I am asked is, "Do you have a copy of your power of attorney?"

"No, I was told it wasn't needed."

"We usually require a power of attorney."

"There isn't much I can do about that, as you can see from the orders my husband is in Iraq."

"Yes, I can see that, but a POA is required."

I am cursing under my breath at this point. And about 15 people have already been give numbers and told to sit down and wait. This means that I am no longer first, and all the seats in the waiting area are full. GRRRRRRRR! Finally, I am given a paper to fill out, and told to wait. Someone will call my name shortly. After waiting for an eternity, and never hearing my name called. I go up to the front desk to ask if I am going to be able to get my ID today. Because my name has yet to be called. I was quickly informed that they never call out names, they go by numbers. So now I am given a number, which once again puts me at the end of the line. I hate waiting. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

This time while I'm waiting, I am assaulted with stupidity. Staff Sgt. Fuck-head sits down beside me, and suddenly he is stricken with a dumbass attack. Which causes him to reach out and touch Fang. Fang is a mama's boy, and he does not sit by and allow strangers to touch him. Instead he screams at the top of his lungs. This causes everyone in the waiting area to turn in my direction and stare. It also prompts a nosey old bat to ask me, "you and your husband must be frisky?" Huh? That is what I was thinking, but I did not say it. Because I was speechless.

I looked at her like she had 3 heads. Which is apparently very similar to my 'please, continue to annoy the hell out of me' look. So she kept talking, "What, is there 9 or 10 months between your children?" When I found my voice I said, "Um no. It's really none of your business, but due to the extra large size of the wee one. I can easily see how you would jump to that very wrong conclusion. Satan is three and a half, while Fang is only 15 months old."

Even after my rude explanation, which should have shut her up. She kept on talking. I hate stupid people.

Shortly after my encounter with the whacks, my number was called. Lucky me! I only had to sit there for two hours to get a ID card that expired Feb 17, 2005. At which point, I guess I am supposed to use my handy dandy teleporter to get DH from Iraq to TX. Because his presence is needed at the ID office. UGH!